Have you ever sat in a meeting, listening to someone present, and thought, "Wow, they're on a completely different level. If only they knew how much I'm faking it"?
That's the feeling of being an outsider looking in the quiet conviction that you're fundamentally different from everyone else. Sometimes it's called imposter syndrome, but at its core, it's a feeling that we don't quite belong. We believe others have a secret rulebook or a level of natural competence we simply lack. We think, "If they truly knew me, they'd realise I don't measure up."
But what if I told you that this feeling is the one thing that connects us all?
The truth is, most people are having the exact same internal monologue. They're looking at you, your accomplishments, or your poise, and thinking the same thing. The presentation you thought was "much higher level" was likely created by someone wrestling with their own doubts.
These feelings aren't a reflection of your incompetence; they are echoes of old stories and messages we've carried since childhood. Our minds are wired to seek patterns, and if we've learned to feel different or not good enough, we'll find evidence of it everywhere. We mistakenly believe these thoughts are a true reflection of reality, not just "a moment of bad weather in the mind."
The path to overcoming this isn't about working harder to "fit in" or proving your worth. It's about building a new relationship with your own mind. By becoming more self-aware, you can:
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Create Distance: Separate the internal noise from the external reality. You can observe your feelings of inadequacy without letting them define you.
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Tune In to the Present: Recognise that you are not a fraud. You are a capable, knowledgeable person in this moment, and your thoughts are just one part of the experience, not the whole truth.
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Discover Connection: Realise that the feeling of being different is a universal human experience. By understanding this, you move from a place of isolation to a place of shared humanity.
When you learn to see your feelings of "otherness" for what they are, moments of bad weather in the mind, not a permanent climate you can stop grasping onto them. This allows you to be more present, become more self-aware, and redirect that energy toward high performance and genuine connection.
If you're ready to stop feeling like an outsider and start building a mindset of unshakeable confidence, send me a DM.